Straight from the sets of Laughter Chefs 2, actress Rubina Dilaik went candid on her YouTube podcast Kisine Bataya Nahi, where she brought forth very personal anecdotes of being body shamed at the start of her TV career. In a conversation with fellow actor Ankita Lokhande, Rubina spoke about an unpleasant chapter in 2008 — the initial days on the set of her first TV show.
She uncovered how cruel remarks regarding her looks drove her to adopt a severe diet. Remembering the period, she said she lived solely on soup for a whole year in a last-ditch attempt to lose weight. Although she did undergo physical change, Rubina pointed out that it came at a high price.
"I was called chubby. I used to think. I have baby fat here and there," she said, going on to add, "Ek director ne camera ke peeche se chillakar bola that, 'waapis bhejo Himachal mein. isko na chalna aata hai aur dikhti bhi golmatol hai'."
(Once a director shouted from behind the camera that they should send me back to Himachal. She doesn't know how to walk and looks round and fat.)
She explained the effect of those words to be very harmful. "You are literally mistreated. It tarnishes your memory to a point that I went on boiled spinach soup and nutri (diet) for one full year, and I vowed to myself that I am going to reach size zero, and I did so."
But the process took a toll on her health and spirit. Rubina remembered feeling weak and tired during her second show, her energy levels lowest.
"My energies were so down. That phase. when I look back. I am like, what was I thinking. I wish somebody had taught me how to embrace myself. Kisine nahi bataya, aap apne me khoobsurat hai. (No one told us that you are beautiful the way you are)."
The actress, who was 19 or 20 when she started in television, recalled how her mountain upbringing — with homemade food and milk as everyday fare — helped her maintain a healthy physique. "I had grown up on ghee, milk, curd. I was a chubby, fresh-faced kid. But in my second show, my cheekbones were prominent, my waist was small — and yet, the glow was missing," she recalled.
" Took me a long time to get out of that trap," Rubina confessed. "I don't want that for my children today."
Her candid admissions resonate with increasing fears about the negative impact of body shaming. Several studies, including one in the South African Journal of Psychiatry, have established that the experience can leave profound psychological and social scars.
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